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Thoughts are powerful | Change your thoughts, Change your life

by Cindy Bayles | May 18, 2020 | Doodle Art Therapy Blog, Goals, Self care

Thoughts Are Powerful

Your thoughts are so powerful they have created your life. And your thoughts will create your future!

The good news is you can change your thoughts. You hold your future in your mind!

Recently, I realized I was waking up every morning thinking “I am struggling”. Upon further observation, I realized I was using the words “I am struggling”: throughout my day. I said it ALL. Of. THE. TIME. As if it were an excuse. “I am struggling to get out of bed”,” I am struggling to eat right.” “I am struggling to get everything done.” “I am struggling to….” And on and on it went.

So why does this even matter? It’s just a thought after all!

Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life

It turns out, our thoughts control what we do. I knew this theoretically but I didn’t believe it in my soul. It feels woo-woo to me. There is nothing concrete about changing your thoughts.

I have often heard the quote:

Watch your thoughts, they become your words; watch your words, they become your actions; watch your actions, they become your habits; watch your habits, they become your character; watch your character, it becomes your destiny. by Lao Tzu

But I have always thought about this in correlation with being a good person. Don’t think bad thoughts so you don’t do bad things mentality. Every time it is referred to in church it is about committing sin and pornography.

In Proverbs 23:7 is says:

For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.

Thoughts are powerful

So if you think good thoughts, do you do good things?

When I think “I am struggling”, I imagine I am in the middle of a big ocean treading-water with the waves splashing in my face. Survival is my only thought. I am not trying to get to shore because I will die if I try. So, I just continue treading water in the middle of the ocean. There are waves crashing into me constantly, big ones, medium ones, and small ones. Every time I catch my breath another one hits.

No rest for the drowning

When the water calms, I lay on my back and float. I can rest. But, there is no way I could save or help someone else. Because we would both drowned. I am just barely able to keep myself alive at the moment. I see no hope that I can move out of this mess and get myself to shore. So I mindlessly tread water, in the middle of the ocean, with waves hitting me in the face, fighting for my life. Every day. Because I think “I am struggling”. A thought I repeat to myself over and over again, multiple times a day.

Because of this, my day looks like this:

Wake up: think “I am struggling.”
Drag myself out of bed.
Pray.
- Plead with God about my struggles.
- Pray and ask who I can help.
- Think “there is no way I can help anyone”.
Struggle through work.
Eat whatever I find.
Do what is urgent.
Collapse into bed.
Repeat.

Have you thought this?

That was dumb.
Why are you so stupid?
I am soooo awkward.
There is no way I could ever do that.
Nobody likes me.
I have no friends.
So and so does it way better than me.
I don’t feel loved. Go here to read how to feel more love. Hint: it has to do with your thoughts.

And on and on we go.

What if there were a different way? What if you could start moving toward the distant shore? What would that look like?

Changing your thoughts is simple and hard

thoughts are powerful

Could it be that simple? I change my thoughts and everything changes?

Yes! It is that simple. But unfortunately, it is hard to do. Some of the thoughts we think have been around for a long time. Most of our thoughts we believe to be true. It would feel strange to stop believing what you believe is true, wouldn’t it?

How to change your thoughts

Step 1:

The first step is to get all of your thoughts out on paper. Just start writing. I find it easiest to choose a subject or an emotion but the goal is to just get it all out of your head. Brain dump all of your thoughts out on paper.

Step 2:

Take a look at all of those thoughts that are swirling around in your head. Crashing like waves into you, circling like sharks around you, looming on the horizon as a storm about to burst over you.

Step 3:

Now, destroy that paper! Rip it up, burn it, whatever it takes to get rid of it. While at the same time saying that these things are not true.

Thoughts are powerful

Step 4:

It’s time to open up your journal and write down some things that you are grateful for. Fill yourself up with positive affirmations. And say at least one of those things to yourself for the rest of the day.

Step 4:

Rinse and repeat.

This is what it looked like when I changed my thoughts:

Before:

Thought: I am struggling
Feeling: Desperation
Action: I stay where I am and keep working to survive.
Result: I keep struggling and I make no progress toward not struggling.

Thoughts are powerful

After:

Thought: You’ve got this!
Feeling: Confident
Action: I take action.
Result: I begin to make progress every single day.

What????? Yep. It’s simply that hard.

Feel The Love | Free Love List

by Cindy Bayles | May 10, 2020 | Doodle Art Therapy Blog, Relationships, Self care

THE FIGHT

pink Fighting-Gloves

My 10-year-old cousin grabbed the paper from my desk and started waving it around. He yelled “Look, Cindy got an F on her paper!” I was already jumping to retrieve the paper. But it was harder than I anticipated. He just held the paper out of my reach. So, I did the most logical think and tackled him. I was not going to be subjected to the humiliation.

I was not going to have everyone see my failure. My failure to color a picture for my science class. My big fat red F at the top of my paper. So, quiet little Cindy fought for her dignity. Although, the fighting wasn’t really dignifying… The teacher waded into the fray and separated us. I was given my assignment back and we were sent to our corners. You would think that was the end of the story.

CONSEQUENCES

However, fighting in the classroom brought consequences. Roger received a kick in the pants that sent him flying out of the classroom door, 15 feet away. And I had to stay after school. Which would have been fine for most normal kids, but not for me. I was the quiet kid who never got into trouble. The girl whose mother had been an invalid for the past 2 years, the kid who’s hair was a mess. The kid who never got her homework done. I was that kid.

yellow school bus

Being kept after school meant that I missed the bus. Which was a big deal. I lived 5 miles away from home. I had no one to call and no way to call. So after “doing my time” with the teacher, I wandered around outside the school in the deserted playground without any idea of what to do or where to go. I felt alone and abandoned. And then out of nowhere my grandmother came looking for me. She realized I was missing and came to find me. When she finally found me, I broke down in tears and sobbed all the way home.

FEEL THE LOVE

I have been thinking about how this incident affected me for the past several days. The only part of that memory I have remembered was the fight. I had forgotten all about the rest. I forgot that my grandmother had come looking for me and that I was not all alone that day. That, someone, did love and care about me and that someone did notice that I was missing. It’s funny how our memories rewrite history, isn’t it? I mean even with my own children, they all have 6 different stories about the same event. And all of the stories are different from the correct interpretation which is mine. (Wink)

FEEL THE LOVE LIST

So I started thinking of all of the other people that have been in my corner. The people who showed up when I needed them. I made a List. It is a list of anyone that has ever loved me or anyone that I have ever loved. My Papa and grandma were at the top of the list. I knew they loved me and would do anything for me. They were my biggest cheerleaders throughout their lives. It was obnoxious at times. I lived with them right after I was born for a while because my mother had to have surgery. I lived with them after my mother and father’s divorce and I moved in again when I was 17 with no place to go. There were many others on that list.

ANGELS AMONG US

The more I wrote the more I realized how much I am loved. Many of those people on the list are no longer with us anymore. But their love still lives on. I can access that love every day. Just by remembering those people that loved me and that were always there to cheer me on.

Because I want to feel more love, I have been praying for those people to be my ministering angels. They are the people that love me and were always in my corner. To celebrate Mother’s day this year. I encourage you to make your own love list and post it where you can see it and add to it every day. It is amazing what happens when there is a tangible list of people that love you and have always been a part of your life. There are Angels Among Us! Look for them. record them. The more you look, the more you will see. When we change what we focus on, we change what we see. That’s what Doodle Therapy is. Doodle Therapy changed how interpret my world.

I have created a free Feel The Love List printable for you here. Use it and start feeling the love.

feel more love heart